Roses
by Astringent
Summary: Roses tell stories. This is a story about Itachi Uchiha and the girl he loved.   Itachi & OC
1. Hisaki

_Thank you_, for choosing to read this.

* * *

**Hisaki.**

Hisaki Uchiha. She was the only child of Junri and Ryuuhi Uchiha. She might have been great.

She might have turned out to be a genius and a prodigy, but _we'll_ never know. The chances were good though. When she was a baby, she used to blow puffs of flame out of her mouth in an effort to amuse herself. Adults would watch with barely suppressed delight at this showing of potential. Even the Hokage seemed pleased when he first met her as an infant. And then there was war, a case of mistaken identities that led to two deaths –war crimes, it was surmised and then dismissed- and her potential vaporized like a drop of water on a stovetop.

It didn't really matter though because another prodigy was born of the ordeal. A four year old Itachi Uchiha had awoken his Sharingan and all about her was forgotten.

* * *

Children born into the circumstance of war, who are in and around it, live with the acute understanding that death –at any given time- will eventually arrive to claim them. Such children are not afraid of death for it is mere deliverance from the situations they must cope with.

Instead, they fear pain, cruelty, betrayal and loneliness.

* * *

Tea roses.

The war may have ended but for those who lost loved ones, the sadness never ended, always lingering about. And for those unlucky survivors, it was impossible to forget the occurrence of war. To some, it was merely a distant concept and after it ended, many acted like such atrocity had never happened.

Every Tuesday, before the sun set, she would place a bouquet of tea roses, and light incense at the foot of the memorial stone. She would stay in quiet contemplation, in remembrance of the faded casualties of war. She couldn't forget them, because her parents were among them. Thus there was nothing she could do but remember and be grateful of the freedoms that they had granted her with the exchange of their lives.

She wondered, at times whether her parents were watching over her. Whether they would have been proud of her and of all the choices she had made.

* * *

_How can you define what a person is?_ Love. She was love, the unconditional caring love of a mother. The kind of love that always wanted the best for you, no matter the repercussions for her. The kind of love that was always there, and never asked anything in return. Even to the end she loved, and that was what he knew her as.


	2. Prodigious

_Thank you_, for choosing to read this.

* * *

**Prodigious.**

Itachi Uchiha was the pride of the Uchiha Clan.

The power, he'd inherited was awakened in the face of war. The war taught him just how dangerous and how terrible possessing power could be.

The man with power could never feel at ease for he would always be in danger. If it was not him, it would be his loved ones. He had learned that all too well. Thus, even though he was powerful, even though he made his parents and his clan and his village proud, he couldn't help but despise himself. He despised the power he possessed and dreaded the pain that it would bring. And for all his life, he lived, worked, fought, and wished and wished for peace.

At six years old, a short year and a half after the end of the war, he was sent to the Ninja Academy to learn to fight. Shisui Uchiha played his mentor, trained him and helped him master his Sharingan. All in noble service to his village, all to keep the peace. To protect others from the horror, pain and loss associated with war.

* * *

_It is a terrible thing to have power and know to love…it makes you a martyr of sorts doesn't it?_ Power was such a fickle thing, full of contradictions and unable to make up its mind on whether or not it likes you. It was hard to figure out if it was a good thing or a bad thing, a blessing or a curse. Perhaps, like the weather, like people, like life, it was always changing.

Power allowed you to protect the ones you love, but it also brought danger to them. Power was obtained whereas love came to people. He supposed he might have counted himself unlucky to have both. How many people could claim that? An unfortunate few.

* * *

The day that he met Kisame Hoshigaki was a distinctive one.

It was after he'd deserted Konoha, a short time after he'd defected to Amegakure. He had been sitting atop the Shinto shrine in solitude, legs dangling precariously over the edge, above a loch of hungry sharks. They could sense him, smell him and thus, they circled about under his feet just waiting for him to make a wrong move and fall into their jaws below. He had been looking out to the surrounding mountains that hid him from the misplaced hatred of people who thought they knew him.

He had been thinking about her.

* * *

He appeared on the Shinto nearly directly behind Itachi, with the stealth and prowess of any sufficient shinobi. He smelled like water and felt more like an animalistic predator than a human. And on his back, Itachi had assessed, was his weapon, but not just a weapon. It too was alive. His voice was coarse when he spoke, sounding simultaneously like the hiss of an angry snake and the bark of a vicious dog.

_"I'll be your partner from now on."_

When he shifted his gaze, Itachi could see him. He had bluish, tough looking skin, sharp beady eyes, gills lining his cheeks. Yet he had a nose too. He looked very strange, shark-like, even more so than his demeanour could foreshadow. In Itachi's mind, he wondered what her impression of this man would be. _It is easier to love when you have not seen so much as I have._ _…I have seen a lot since we've parted and the world is full of more horrors and more cruelty than you could ever imagine._

He didn't hesitate to continue when Itachi gave no reply. He spoke on with the intention of impressing, of establishing polite acquaintance with the touch of fear.

_"I'm Hoshigaki Kisame, formerly of Kirigakure and one of the seven ninja swordsmen." _Kisame. Hoshigaki Kisame. Itachi found that he didn't really care for the introduction. He couldn't really have cared less for Hoshigaki Kisame, who was to be his new partner. Yet the man, or shark…the shark-man continued to speak, not the least intimidated by Itachi's silence, nor put off by his apathy. _"And you're Uchiha Itachi, formerly of Konohagakure. I've heard the rumours about you… that you killed the rest of the Uchiha clan…"_

His lack of reaction was mistaken for apathy of his crime. He might have struck Hoshigaki Kisame as a quiet young man. Quiet, and deadly. The type of person who gave no regard to others and killed on whims.

_"I understand you well, that's why I wanted you for my partner out of everyone in Akatsuki… The feeling of killing your comrades can't be put into words, can it, Itachi-san?"_ He had exhilaration in his voice. As if he'd found a new high and was dying to express the feeling again. It was disgusting.

_"You sure do talk a lot. You think you understand me, but what about yourself? You wandered through the mist to get here… but you're nothing but a rogue who can't even decide on his own destination. …am I wrong?"_

It was a nice day. Nice for a village known for its rain. The air was cool and still. There was overcast, overcast that made everything seem duller and more ominous still. The surround mountains and the loch and the clouds above gave a confining feel. It was the kind of weather that would have ideally preceded a battle, a fight to the death.

Still, the grass was a lush green and light reflected off the surface of the water. She would have liked that, Itachi was sure. He would have liked to think that she wouldn't even have minded the sharks.

_"Let me tell you something," rasped Kisame. He had drawn his sword, held it not even inches from Itachi's head. _

He sounded wound up, ready to release his pent up energy, keen to draw blood. Itachi didn't flinch, death and pain were nothing next to the suffering of losing loved ones, of knowing the one person who was still alive that he still cared for was suffering too.

_"Sharks lay eggs, but the eggs hatch within the mother before they are born. However, the number of eggs a shark lays is not the same number as the number of babies she has. …Why do you think that is?"_

Itachi didn't care to find out. Of course he was told anyway.

_"They eat each other." He said it with relish, with delight or some sick fascination with the idea. "As soon as the eggs hatch within the mother's womb, the babies begin to eat each other. They begin killing each other the moment they're born. Everyone else is nothing but food."_

His story held a warning.

_"Staring today you and I are comrades in Akatsuki. But watch out…for me."_

Not even an ounce of will power, the silent unsheathing of a blade. His eyes morphed, forming into a pinwheel of sorts. _I could say the same…_ And his comrade, Hoshigaki Kisame snickered. He changed demeanours, withdrawing his sword. He spoke, sounding more calm, more friendly. Yet he hadn't lost that underlying element of danger.

_"Well, let's try and get along. And hope we're not each other's last opponent."_

Itachi stood up.

_"Be prepared. Those who turn their hands against their comrades are sure to die a terrible death." _

_A snicker from the shark-man. "Then the both of us are already both branded as terrible men, are we not?"_

_"No. We are humans, not fish. We don't know what kind of we _truly_ are until the moment before our deaths. As death comes to embrace you, you will realize what you are. That's what death _is_ don't you think?"

* * *

_

His death was not terrible, and neither was he. He lived for good and died for good. His death was just one thing in the bigger scheme of things, just as his life had been. His suffering was long, and drawn out. Perhaps he'd deserved to suffer as he did, a purgatory for his heinous deeds. But as life parted from him, he saw the face of his beloved brother and he thought of her. The pain faded, and he felt better.


	3. The Story

_Thank you_, for choosing to read this.

* * *

**The Story.**

_What defines a story is not how it ends, but what happens to get to the end.

* * *

_

She lived in a townhouse inside the Uchiha complex.

Nearly seven years ago, a nine-tailed fox demon attacked the village. Two months later, the Uchiha complex had been build –to reinforce the community bonds of the clan- and all those who were Uchiha were asked to move into the complex. It had been Fugaku, the clan leader who had urged the clan to do it. He insisted that the privacy of the complex would ensure the clan's long lasting bonds with one another.

Following the words of the clan leader, Hisaki and all the other Uchiha packed up their stuff without question and moved. Back then, she'd only been ten, and her grandmother had still been alive. Hisaki's grandmother had not been pleased to relocate, insisting that if they moved, all of the history of their household, of Hisaki's parents, would be forgotten.

Hisaki secretly thought that their household had _already_ been forgotten, but she didn't make her grandmother feel even more displaced by stating it. Instead, she told her grandmother with words more wise than a ten year old's that material didn't make memories, people do and that as long as they wouldn't forget, Hisaki's parents would not be forgotten. And so the grandmother took word from her grandchild and allowed herself to be moved.

Hisaki's grandmother had died years ago. Hisaki's last memories of her grandmother were not pleasant ones. She'd always wandered the complex, walked aimlessly around the village in a bad mood. In her old age, she was bitter and unhappy. She hated living in the complex, being given only a townhouse in which to reside (the clan members had reasoned that one old lady and her granddaughter would need no more) and constantly went on about feeling betrayed by the clan.

After Hisaki's parents had died and after Hisaki had decided to so stubbornly decided not to pursue becoming a shinobi, the clan had stopped acknowledge their household and they'd stopped respecting Hisaki's grandmother. Her grandmother was miserable, and then she passed away.

After she passed away, Hisaki lived alone.

* * *

What makes a happy ending?

In a fairy tale, the protagonists overcome adversity, marry their love interests and live happily ever after. It was as if after facing the adversity, all characters just forgot about that which they'd overcome. Cinderella forgot the torturous years of living like a slave to her step-mother. Snow White forgot about all those attempts on her life. The Little Mermaid happily left behind her previous life, her family and her friends. They'd all moved on, and they were happy.

Happy endings, crafted so aptly in fairy tales were not nearly the case with reality. In the fairy tale version of events, the war would end and everyone would live happily after. But happily ever after did not constitute in real life. The war left Hisaki without parents, and that was not something she could just forget about when the war ended. After her grandmother left her too, Hisaki had no one. It was hardly, 'and she lived happily ever after.'

* * *

"Hey onee-chan," said a six year old Uzumaki Naruto through his meal. When he ate, he was sloppy and almost animalistic in his actions. More often than not, he gulped down his food with little inhibition. Perhaps it was the demon inside him that prompted such characteristics. "Do you remember a lot about my parents?"

It was characteristics of kids who hadn't known their parents to be a bit over-obsessed with their lineage. We all want what we don't have. Thus, orphans want families. Hisaki too, could remember asking her grandmother and Shisui about her parents so often they'd get annoyed and tell her off.

_Onee-chan_, he'd called her. The title made her sad.

Hisaki thought about what she remembered of Naruto's parents. They had been friends with her parents. Hisaki's grandmother had often boasted that Hisaki's parents were held in such high esteem, they were even close friends with the Hokage and his wife. She couldn't recall any of that though, Hisaki hadn't been born yet. The funnier thing was that she recalled Naruto's parents with more clarity than she could her own.

"They were very strong, and very kind," Hisaki told the eager six year old. She remembered revering them as a child. The Hokage and his wife seemed to be legendary, and unapproachable yet, every time she needed them, they'd been there. They used to visit Hisaki and her grandmother. She even remembered Kushina Uzumaki's pregnancy and asking to touch her belly. "And they were respected by everyone in the village."

She'd expected Naruto to be proud, to beam and remark how he knew his parents were really great. Instead, he looked sad, lowering his eyes, surely hoping to hide the fact that he was on the brink of tears. "If that's true, then why does everyone hate me?"

Hisaki was unsure of how to answer this question. She was stricken by the desperate longing of a child to be loved. _Children need love_, thought Hisaki. _That's why their parents shouldn't be forced to leave them._ Since she'd been thirteen, the third Hokage had paid her to babysit Naruto.

"Those who did not know Minato and Kushina like you and I did cannot love Naruto as we can," Hiruzen Sarutobi had explained to her when she'd asked him why he'd picked her to care for Naruto when it should have been everyone's honour to do so. In the years past, Hisaki had come to realize it was more than that. Of all the people in the village, she was the one who could empathize most closely with Naruto because she too had lost her parents at a young age.

At times like the present, Hisaki felt a pang of sadness at the slight déjà vu of knowing yet another child whose childhood had been so despairingly tainted by the death of his parents. Seeing him so sad brought water to her eyes too.

"Oh, Naruto," she said picking him up and letting him rest his head against her shoulder as he shed tears.

He was small for his age and light in Hisaki's arms, but he stood out with his shocking blonde hair and bright blue eyes. Even at six he looked so much like the fourth Hokage. And his face bore markings of whiskers. It was cruel that every time someone looked at him, they would be reminded of what he harboured. And they would ostracize him, act as harshly as children who hadn't learned better. How could people be so cruel? To a child, no less.

"People resent what they can't measure up to," Hisaki explained. "Everyone in the village knows that you are going to grow up and be great. They are just envious because even though your parents aren't here, there are so many people who still love and care for you."

"Then why do I feel like no one likes me?" asked Naruto through his runny nose and sniffles.

"You cannot doubt that there are people who love you, Naruto," said Hisaki, echoing the words of Naruto's own parents. "Doubt can eat through all of our hopes and dreams. So don't be sad for those who treat you unkindly. Be happy for those who don't, okay?"

She carried Naruto around the house until her arms got numb and he'd cried himself to sleep.

* * *

When Naruto thought of the Uchiha, he could not recall nearly half of what Sasuke could. While Sasuke could very distinctly remember the entire village, where each person lived, how they interacted and such; Naruto's knowledge of the Uchiha clan was limited to two people, Sasuke being one of them. The other was Hisaki.

When he saw the Uchiha struggling he was reminded of himself. He would remember Hisaki, who told him she knew the feelings he harboured and of course he wouldn't believe her because no one could possibly know how he felt. Then Sasuke threw Naruto into her shoes and he felt that he knew exactly how she must have felt.

Sasuke had known Hisaki too, that was something Naruto always knew. Often, she'd speak of Sasuke. She would say that he was Naruto's age and that she would have loved it if they became friends.

In his later years, he tried so hard to sway Sasuke out of his ending mourning. He tried to befriend the younger Uchiha because Naruto was sure that, if Hisaki could come through and be there for him, he could do the same for Sasuke. That was the way that kindness travelled. You get it, and then you pass it on.

* * *

As an afterthought, when Naruto found out about the heinous crimes of Itachi Uchiha, he could hardly believe that the girl he'd called 'onee-chan', the one who was so kind and understanding and pure, had loved him.


	4. Conventional

It is frightfully embarrassing to read through ones own publications to find spelling, grammar or wording errors. Such things really make readers go, "What the _hell?_" And prompts them (you) to reel in confusion and experience doubt in the competencies of the author. If you've experienced such while reading the fanfiction, I am _truly_ sorry. On the other hand, I hope you can disregard such techincalities and enjoy the story anyways.

_Thank you_, for choosing to read this.

* * *

**Conventional.**

There were many people that both Hisaki and Itachi Uchiha were acquainted with. For instance, they both knew Hiruzen Sarutobi, Shisui Uchiha, Kakashi Hatake and Minato and Kushina when they still lived. Thus, it was rather a surprise that two people who lived in the same village, ran in the same social circles and were a part of the same clan, did not know each other. In fact, it was such a surprise that no one had ever thought of introducing them, having always assumed they knew each other.

They met each other under rather conventional circumstances. Curiously, it was under the same circumstances that many mothers of young children became acquainted. They met at the park, where they'd taken their younger counterparts, Sasuke and Naruto to play.

* * *

By the time most people had graduated the ninja academy as Genin, Itachi had already been promoted to a Chuunin, by which time he'd already mastered his Sharingan. Itachi didn't have much in the way of a childhood, thus when Sasuke expressed his desire to go play in the park, Itachi found the whim to be unprecedented and strange.

"_Aniki_," said Sasuke, scowling slightly at Itachi's hesitation to play with him at the park. He stood as tall as he could, arms crossed at his chest, brows furrow and lips in a distinctive pout. "_Please_, you promised you'd play with me!"

Sasuke stood a half Itachi's height and the older Uchiha couldn't help but find his stand more comical than anything. He always liked that Sasuke was so animated. And even as Itachi surveyed his brother rather bemusedly, he couldn't say no. Itachi gave soft chuckle, nodded his head towards the door and felt happy as he watched Sasuke exclaim in happiness and run right out the door.

* * *

It was a nice day outside, the kind of day where the weather alone made it worth living in Konohagakure. The sun was shining, the sky a perfect sky blue. Even the scattered clouds were so fluffy and white that they seemed painted. People were out and about greeting on another with friendly 'hello's and giving greeting to the two Uchiha brothers as well.

Sasuke walked a bit in front of Itachi, garnering smiles of frank adoration from passers-by. He was a very handsome boy, even at six. After a while, Sasuke got bored of walking by himself and waited for Itachi to catch up before taking his older brother's hand and leading him to the park.

For such a beautiful day, there was a surprisingly small number of people at the park. In fact, there was only one child playing at the playground, a small blonde boy, the same age as Sasuke. It was Naruto Uzumaki, son of the fourth Hokage, the host of Kyuubi. His guardian was sitting on the park bench by the slide, a teenage girl with long black hair pulled back in a loose plait save for the fringe of hair that rested just above her eyebrows. She sat in a neat position, legs together, back straight, just as one might expect in a rather formal classrooms.

Sasuke paid no mind to this girl. Instead he eyed Naruto furtively, and turned to look up at his brother. It was clear by the crease of his brows that he was hesitant to play there now that someone else had intruded upon what he'd hoped to be _his_ space. Sasuke frowned a little and Itachi chuckled. Kids were so weird.

"Go on," he said softly so that only Sasuke could hear and he gave his brother a light push towards the playground. Sasuke walked forward a few steps, eyes fixed on Naruto, who hadn't noticed him. He turned back to look at Itachi again. Itachi gave him an encouraging nod and he walked all the way to the sandy confines of the playground.

Itachi walked towards the bench where Naruto's guardian sat. She watched him as he walked towards her, not looking away when he met her eyes, not even when he sat down beside her. She had the same dark eyes as himself and Sasuke, and with mild, undetectable surprise, he registered the fact that she too was an Uchiha.

He had never met an Uchiha he'd never met before. The thought came out strange, even worded silently in his head. He supposed it was arguable that he would never meet an Uchiha he'd never met because at the moment when he would meet them, he would have met them. It was very mixed up and confusing, and Itachi had a time sorting the thoughts out. The point, however, was that he didn't know who this Uchiha girl was.

"Thank you," she said softly, as Itachi had a silent debate of whether or not to introduce himself. He'd always had a hard time making friends. Itachi looked to her and she was smiling at him, aware that he had heard her. Her statement hadn't required any kind of reply what so ever. She had simply thanked him, however, it was so unprecedented –Itachi had never had any sort of exchange with her prior- that she prompted a response anyways.

"For what?" he asked her.

"For not leaving," she said. And as she did so, her gaze turned from him to the blonde boy on the swing.

Naruto, swinging back and forth, was watching with undisguised curiosity as Sasuke sat in the sandbox, making a sandcastle looking uncomfortable, and completely ignoring him. Itachi understood at once. No doubt the playground hadn't been empty all day. Only when she'd decided to take Naruto to play. She smiled sadly at the sight of him.

"People have a tendency to ostracize that which they cannot comprehend or empathize with. The result is that anyone with the slightest abnormalities becomes alone, misunderstood and friendless," she said. There was a pause in which both parties reflected on her words. She turned back to Itachi, smiling at him. "I'm Uchiha Hisaki, I don't think we've ever met before."

"Uchiha Itachi," said Itachi, feeling uncomfortable. There was always so degree of discomfort in introducing yourself, particularly to someone who bears the same surname as yourself. _Uchiha_ was not exactly a common name and Itachi felt as though he should have already known Hisaki, if not for the sole reason of sharing a surname then at the least because she was in the same clan as him and likely lived in the Uchiha complex as well.

And of course, there is an even worse feeling that comes with not knowing someone who knows you already. It makes the humble feel as though they are extremely pretentious. Hisaki gave Itachi that exact feeling of guiltiness when she nodded in understanding and said, "Oh, so _you're_ Itachi Uchiha." What was that supposed to mean with the exaggerated 'you're'? The tone in which she said it could have implied anything.

"I've heard about you," she explained further and she laughed when his eyes narrowed the slightest in suspicion of what she might have heard and who from. "All good things," she assured him quickly and they didn't say any more to one another for the duration of their time together.

Instead, they sat in awkward silence for a while. It felt as though they ought to have something to talk about. Both were of the same clan and probably had some acquaintance in common. Otherwise they could have discussed the goings-on of the village, Sasuke and Naruto, the weather. Yet neither felt like forcing conversation on the other. After a while, the discomfort dispelled and both were left to their own thoughts and devices, watching idly as their younger companions play near but not with one another. They too were hyper-aware of each other's presence.

At last, it was Hisaki who ended the prolonged suffering of two shy boys. She stood up in a swift movement, straightened her clothes and dusted herself off. "Well it was nice meeting you, Itachi-san," she said to him. Her voice was soft and girlish. The type of voice that could have just as easily been shrill and sharply penetrating on the ears, but it wasn't. Instead, when she spoke, it was like a daydreaming girl, humming a melody to a song that no one really knew. "Thank you again… It's not every day that Naruto gets to be the one to walk away."

With that, she turned away from him, not even waiting for Itachi's response. She walked towards Naruto. "Naruto, it's time to go," she said to him. The boy whined in protesting response, the kind of thing Itachi had witnessed in Sasuke an infinite number of times. Kids really did all act the same. And just like Sasuke always obeyed him, Naruto dragged his heels on the sand to stop his swinging, hopped off and followed her. She smiled at him, offering her hand out to him. Naruto took it, as if it was the most natural thing in the world yet the scene was strange and novel to the two Uchiha brothers who looked on.

Uchiha were very exclusive to interacting within the clan. Witnessing Hisaki holding the hand of a very obviously _not_ Uchiha, Naruto, was unnatural and didn't feel right. But neither Hisaki nor Naruto noticed the two staring as they walked away. They discussed dinner plans, Naruto cheering as she offered to buy him ramen. As they walked out of sight, Sasuke breathed a sigh of relieve. All previous discomfort forgotten, he promptly ran up to Itachi and demanded that Itachi help him build the sandcastle.

* * *

_People have a tendency to ostracize that which they cannot comprehend or empathize with. The result is that anyone with the slightest abnormalities becomes alone, misunderstood and friendless._

Itachi remembered her words when he lay awake in bed that night. He thought of all the times when he felt trapped and alone, and when no one could understand him despite his desire for them to be able to. He remembered realizing that he was the kind of person that people liked to admire from afar yet no one wanted to be close to. And he reflected on just how true her words had been.

Sasuke had wandered into his room in the midst of the night. He stood at the doorway, careful not to enter until he had permission.

"Aniki," he said timidly.

"What is it, Sasuke?" asked Itachi, staring the six year old down. Sasuke looked nervous and hesitant, just as he had been at the playground that day.

"I couldn't sleep," he explained, sounding a bit ashamed that he wasn't braver. "I had a nightmare. Will you let me stay here for the night?"

Itachi's features softened as he beckoned his younger brother into the room. Sasuke looked embarrassed but delighted. He climbed onto Itachi's bed and lay comfortably beside him. Itachi was the best big brother in the world. He was brave and smart and the best ninja Sasuke knew, which was why he felt safe with Itachi. Sasuke smiled as he closed his eyes.

"Thanks aniki," he murmured, falling back into slumber. "You're the best."

And beside him, sleeping soundly, lay Itachi's proof that he was not completely alone. Itachi had only ever felt distant and alone because he chose to be. The younger Uchiha really had no idea how much Itachi owed to him. It was Sasuke's unconditional love that made Itachi feel assured, and more resolved than ever to be a better brother, the kind of brother that Sasuke wanted.


	5. Tuesday

My chapters seem to be getting longer...hm...

_Thank you_, for choosing to read this.

* * *

**Tuesday.**

Ironic it may have been, it was a Tuesday when Mikoto Uchiha last saw Junri Uchiha. It was Tuesday when they last exchanged words.

_"Please," she begged through her desperation and tears. She clutched at Junri's shirt, not even ashamed at having the younger Uchiha see her like this. "Please, Junri, please, promise me you'll find him. Promise me you'll save him. Promise me he won't be hurt. He's all we have! Please! You have to, you have to save him…" Mikoto couldn't continue for she broke down into silent sobs, still holding onto Junri as if for dear life, crying into her chest and soaking her shirt with tears._

_With the dignity and grace befitting the wife of the head of the Uchiha clan, Junri Uchiha held her long-time friend's arms with gentle composure and eased Mikoto to stand up. Junri looked her right in the eyes when she made her promise. "Mikoto," she said her voice steady, demonstrating the confidence she hardly felt. "Itachi will be safe, you have my word. We'll bring him back to you."_

Junri Uchiha had kept her word. She had kept Itachi Uchiha safe. Itachi was without a scratch when he was brought back to Konohagakure. Like an omnipresent blessing, Junri and Ryuuhi had somehow watched over him as he was whisked away to safety and the warm arms of his mother and father. In their turn, Junri and Ryuuhi had died, and Mikoto Uchiha had never lived that down.

_"So this is the end," murmured Junri to her husband. "I could never imagine us getting old anyways, Ryuuhi."_

_Her husband gave a weak chuckle. He held her in his arms, feeling the pain dispel and the numbness sinking in._

_"And our daughter," lamented Junri. "Poor Hisaki…"_

_"She's strong," Ryuuhi assured her. "…She'll be…fine…"

* * *

_

On Tuesday afternoon, Hisaki wept at the memorial stone, the soft caress of incense doing nothing to remind her of the fact that her parents were dead. The years had passed and her memories of them faded. It shamed her that she could hardly remember what they looked like. The bright sun and the warm breeze felt embracing but it did not match Hisaki's desolate mood and did nothing to cheer her up.

"She cries for the parents she cannot remember," people would say.

They would think that she was an oddity, they would not understand. But they who saw her with a critical eye couldn't feel the pain she felt. The pain she remembered feeling when she witnessed people, _children_, slaughtered like animals. The pain of loss and sadness and sheer terror sometimes stabbed at her. Being tortured would have been more endurable.

Tuesdays were the days she let herself think about it. And when she thought, and tried to understand, she would cry until she had no more tears to shed, and move on. In her later years, it happened with less frequency but every time it did, it was just as bad.

* * *

The second time Itachi met her was that Tuesday. He had been out in the village, running an errand for his mother, buying milk and produce because they had run out when he heard two girls talking as they walked past him. They were civilians, girls he did not recognize though they were around his age.

"Where's Hisaki?" asked the shorter girl. Though she asked, Itachi could tell by her disengaged tone that the question was not out of concern but prompted by boredom. It was idle conversation that bore little importance to both girls.

"Out by the memorial stone," replied the second girl. She gave a glance towards Itachi as they walked by. Mild interest. She shrugged as she turned away from Itachi. "Having a good cry, you know how she is." The way she said it, she almost sounded exasperated, bored at the behaviour of their third friend. She implied that it was normal to observe Hisaki behaving as such.

"Ah," said the first girl, a tone of comprehension. "It's Tuesday."

The two girls walked away, changing their subject to the plans for the remainder of the day. Just as the first time he met her, Itachi could have easily disregarded this and gone home. However, just as the first time, Itachi found curiosity poking at his mind. What kind of girl was Hisaki Uchiha, to be 'having a good cry' at the memorial stone on a beautiful day like it was that day. A gentle breeze wrapped itself around Itachi, urging him to explore this unexplored ground.

Making up his mind, he changed directions, walking towards the memorial stone, two bags of groceries still in his hands.

* * *

Her crying had eased up when she heard someone coming. She sobbing had ended and instead, she knelt on the ground, tears steadily dropping onto her lap. The petals of the flowers she'd brought rustled with the grass in the soft wind. For a girl who'd never gone any sensory training, her hearing was rather impeccable. She wasn't good enough, however, to be able to defer the weight and quality of steps as shinobi had been trained to, and so she thought he was Kakashi Hatake.

"Kakashi-san," she said, her voice weary from crying. She didn't turn around to look at him. She seldom ever did when they met at the memorial stone. "It's been some time since we've come across each other here."

"No," replied the person who'd knelt down beside her. The moment he said it, Hisaki knew she was mistaken. This voice was different, low but soft and more distant sounding than even Kakashi could manage. "I am not Hatake Kakashi."

Hisaki looked up in surprise. Kneeling beside her was Itachi Uchiha, whom she'd met once before. He was gazing straight ahead at the memorial stone, as if he'd been there the whole time. He looked pensive and Hisaki was almost afraid to interrupt. After a long pause between the two, Hisaki spoke.

"No," she said rather lamely. "You are not."

She wiped her tears and turned her gaze to her lap, where it had previously been. Itachi stole a glance at her and she didn't notice. Even though he wasn't looking directly at her, he couldn't miss the look of her. Her eyes were bloodshot from crying, her cheeks flushed and the trail of tears that had ran down her cheeks were visible, reflecting off the sunlight. Her long black hair was down today, swept to one side of her head and hanging down, a curtain shielding Hisaki from his view.

He wondered if he should try to comfort her, but was hesitant to disturb her silent reverie. Instead, he turned his attention to the bouquet of flowers lying at the foot of the memorial stone. They were roses, wrapped up with humble wrapping paper, a plain, soft brown, tied by a thin white ribbon. The roses were among the most exquisite he'd ever seen, in full bloom, with petals the began a pale yellow but almost magically transformed to a soft pink at its ends. Itachi imagined they smelled nice too, but he couldn't be sure because the incense was what filled his nose.

"Why are you here?" Hisaki asked, just after Itachi had finished with his idle observations and lapsed into remembrance of those who participated in the war he had lived through. She wasn't crying anymore. Though her eyes were still a bit pink and swollen, her cheeks were no longer flushed and her tear stains had gone.

"I…was just passing," said Itachi, not keen on admitting he'd come looking for her when he'd heard rumours she'd been crying here. He watched her carefully, to see whether or not she bought the lie. By the slight raising of eyebrows it was plain that she did not.

"On your way back to the complex?" she asked sceptically, eyeing his bags of groceries. "…from grocery shopping?"

To any resident of Konoha above the age of four, it was common knowledge to understand at least the basic geography of the village. It just so happened that the memorial stone and the Uchiha complex were literally across the village from one another. The grocery store was a mere three blocks from the complex. Logic had it that the memorial stone was nowhere near 'passing by' distance from the complex to the grocery store.

Itachi could see why she was not the least convinced. Quick, like the genius he was, he pulled a story out from thin air. "No," he said as if the idea was absolutely stupid. "After I went to buy groceries, Gai asked a favour of me to demonstrate genjutsu to his pupils at the training ground. As I was coming back, the urge struck me to visit the memorial stone in order to place an offering of remembrance."

"Oh," she said, looking a bit less sceptical, and perhaps a bit guilty at being so suspicious of him. There was another pause. "Then where is your offering of remembrance?"

Itachi reached for his grocery bag and pulled out the most flower-like thing he could feel. When he pulled it out, and looking down, found himself holding a bushel of broccoli. That had been unprecedented. They both looked down at the broccoli for a brief moment, before looking up to meet each other's eyes. Why in all his luck did he have to pull _that_ out. Then again, what would have been a better substitution? Carrots? Milk? Potatoes?

"Broccoli?" asked Hisaki.

"Yes," said Itachi confidently. He placed the broccoli beside the flowers as if he wasn't questioning himself, lamenting his dignity or wondering if she still thought him sane. "It's very good for one's health."

Another pause and Itachi realized that he was experiencing an inescapable bought of stupidity. It was very embarrassing. Hisaki blinked and turned her gaze to the broccoli. "Yes, I suppose health might be the primary concern of people who have passed away," she remarked softly. Her tone didn't imply sarcasm like her words did.

"It symbolizes my wish for them to be healthy in their next life," Itachi explained intelligently. Even he commended himself for this smooth save. Another pause occurred between them, a thoughtful one.

"Oh," said Hisaki in that same tone she'd used the last time she'd vocalized it. Itachi stood up feeling smug and Hisaki followed. They walked away from the memorial stone together, Hisaki having lapsed into a thoughtful absent-minded silence. "Perhaps I should start bringing broccoli when I come here…"

"Don't!" said Itachi quickly. She looked at him startled. Itachi was unsure of just how much of an idiot he would feel if he'd somehow influenced her to bring _broccoli_ to the memorial stone. He was already beginning to feel badly about his little lie. If he was to keep up his story, he would likely have to bring broccoli to the memorial stone every time he visited now. "…Your flowers are much nicer," he explained to her, returning to his previously cool and collect demeanour.

She gave a soft laugh at his reaction. "Thank you," she said again, beaming at him.

"For what?" he asked as he had done the previous time.

"For complimenting the flowers," she told him. They walked back to the Uchiha complex together. They parted ways at the entrance. "It was very nice to meet you again, Itachi-san," said Hisaki as she walked away. Itachi watched her go, standing there until she turned the corner out of his sight. It was nice, Itachi decided as he made his way home. He thought it was very nice to meet her again too.

* * *

"Itachi," said Mikoto Uchiha as she unpacked the groceries.

"Hn?" replied Itachi, who'd settled at the dining table to complete the report for his last mission while a curious and over-energized Sasuke tried to peer over his shoulder.

"Where's the broccoli I asked you to buy?" questioned Mikoto, looking through the empty grocery bags again, as if expecting them to have materialized as she wasn't looking. "I was going to make it for dinner."

Remembering the previous events of that day, Itachi couldn't help but smile a little and even more so when Sasuke cheered his opinion of this development. "I'm sorry," he said apologizing. "I must have forgotten to buy it."

* * *

_In terms of Itachi's strange behaviour this chapter_,

I could honestly see him do something as ridiculous as placing broccoli at the memorial stone in such a serious and confident manner that no one would question him twice. He seems to be quite good at decieving people.

And in terms of geography, I googled 'map of konoha' and went from there.


	6. Hands

FTW, to the person who can answer _this _question:

**Where in life did it ever mention that Itachi is fond of dango?**

_Thank you_, for choosing to read this.

* * *

**Hands.**

After that afternoon, Itachi Uchiha was overcome with a bout of restlessness that nothing seemed able to combat. He was subject to pacing around the house, getting absolutely nothing accomplished when in fact, there was plenty to get done. When pacing around the house no longer sufficed to satisfy his restlessness, he walked around the complex, then the village. Even then he couldn't settle himself so he went to the training grounds to train. Of course, there wasn't much to do when training as he was already accomplished at one too many of his skills for self improvement.

Itachi practiced throwing his kunai. He'd always had some trouble hitting multiple targets while moving. It was a useful skill that allowed him to evade attacks while attacking, supposedly. Somehow, defeating an adversary was never as easy as throwing one well-aimed kunai. Still, developing skills was developing skills. Training had that mind-numbing effect Itachi desired. He needed that pointless repetitive action that would keep his thoughts in hiatus, even if for the shortest while.

Itachi got fed up by the time he threw his tenth set of kunai, each meeting its target, even the one in his blind spot. He walked away from the training site, noticing that Sasuke had somehow found him, and had been watching. Normally, he would have stopped and escorted Sasuke home, but he found that he really didn't want the strenuous task of having to pay attention and respond to everything his brother said. Itachi knew how much his brother hated not being heard and thus decided save Sasuke that frustration by not keeping his company.

"You know, it's strange that we are both Uchiha yet when we meet one another, it's never inside the complex," remarked Hisaki Uchiha when she met him in passing. Itachi noticed how much brighter she seemed compared to the last time they'd met. Her eyes were not bloodstained, her cheeks not stained with tears. She looked healthy, and had a subtle glow about her. He supposed that unlike himself, most people could hardly maintain a morose demeanour for extended periods of time.

"Yes," replied Itachi quietly. It wasn't really strange at all. Who was to say that two people who lived in the same village could only meet in a certain place within it? Perhaps she was subliminally pointing out they could find commonality in loose ties with the clan. This was not true by any means, for both of them. "I suppose it could be considered strange."

She stared at him for a second, as if trying to decipher the meaning behind his cryptic response. "So, what brings you to this side of the village?" she asked. As she did so, Hisaki rocked backwards and forwards on the balls of her feet. It was an idle movement. Perhaps she was keen to be rid of his company. "Making more offerings of broccoli to our deceased friends?" Her voice was pleasant but her tone was heavy with sarcasm.

It occurred to Itachi that perhaps she hadn't been so stupid as to have bought his prior lie. When the thought arrived to him, he realized that he'd been a bit foolish in honestly believing she had. She was an Uchiha, after all. Members of the Uchiha clan were practically genetically coded to be 'smarter than the average bear'.

"I was training," he informed her, glad to have a legitimate (and honest) reason this time. It felt strange, having to make excuses as to why he was in certain places. He shouldn't be subject to such things. Not when he was a member of the village and was therefore entitled be wherever he wanted, whenever he wanted, no questions asked.

Perhaps Itachi had shown his displeasure through a slight frown because Hisaki continued to say, a bit defensively, "I was just wondering."

"What brings you here?" Itachi countered.

"I'm on my way to visit the memorial stone," Hisaki explained. As if to reiterate her point, she shuffled the bouquet of flowers she held in her arms. They were the same as the ones she'd brought the previous week.

Why was it that she could sound perfectly normal in giving her answers? Because she wasn't up to weird creepy things like following people around the village, Itachi answered himself. Innocent people never had to make up strange stories and explanations.

"Do you want to come with me?" asked Hisaki, looking up at him with her earnest dark eyes. Her eyes would have drawn him in had he not been so used to seeing the very pair of them on every member of the clan.

Itachi hesitated. To decline would have been rude. On the other hand, he wasn't sure he could handle the company of a crying girl in his restlessness. Watching girls cry was never a pleasant thing in any case.

As if she read his mind, Hisaki replied with a hint of dryness, "I won't cry this time, promise." Truthfully, Hisaki was not sure why she'd even offered let alone why she was trying to convince him all of a sudden. Now that she had, there was no helping it, so she held out a hand and to agree to come, all he had to do was take it.

* * *

_Every week, the members of Akatsuki would enter their common dining area to find a vase filled with flowers on their dining table. The flowers were always the same, tea roses, in a delicate early bloom, their soft pink petals unfurling just enough to reveal the yellow inside. _

_The other members noticed and in their minds, they questioned but they never asked. Nor did they ever touch the flowers. Instead, they allowed the blossoms to remain on their dining table and silently reflected on their beauty when they had their meals._

_That was the thing that allowed Itachi to be a little fonder of the people he was sharing life with. They were not regular people. Regular people would have asked, demanded and not relented until given confirmation and explanation that the reason behind the madness remained within their ideas of acceptability. Akatsuki accepted him, without need of reason. What he was, they didn't mind. What he'd done bore little consequence with them. In the time that he'd been there, he'd always been free to be himself._

_They'd always let the roses be. Because of that, Itachi was sure she would have seen the good in them. And because he saw what she would have seen, he too came to recognize the good in these malevolent people._

* * *

Her skin was smooth and soft he had to resist his urge to run his fingers over her hands just to capture a better feel of her. Holding her hand was surprisingly sensual, and Itachi became acutely aware of how close they were walking and of how the floral scent of her perfume wafted to him in the soft breeze, and of the fact that he was blushing. When was the last time he had ever blushed? He couldn't remember, but it was certainly happening then, his cheeks burned and he snuck a peek at Hisaki to see if she'd noticed; she hadn't.

He ought not to feel as flustered at something as seemingly trivial as holding hands. Why was it that the act was as intimate as it was?

As they walked, their hands fell into place, fingers lacing through one another. The hands held each other in a loose relaxed grip though the owners of these hands were tense and hyper-aware and had hearts that were fluttering like hummingbirds. Hisaki caught his eye the next time he dared peek at her. She had the gaze of an angel, her dark eyes luring him in and not willing to let his gaze go. She was flushing too, her cheeks a delicate shade of pink that matched the ends of the rose petals. She smiled at him then giggled, recognizing his embarrassment and in a moment they were transformed into first-time lovers.

She didn't stop giggling and Itachi suspected that Hisaki might not have been giggling fully out of embarrassment. When he met her with a questioning look, she did something unprecedented. The grip on his hand suddenly tightened as Hisaki clasped her fingers against his hands. She pulled him towards her but he was so strong that she only ended up pulling herself closer to him. Their arm and shoulder made brief contact and in the moment when Itachi felt her brush against him, she leaned up towards his ear.

Foolishly, he thought she was about to kiss him, but she didn't. Her closeness and sweet smell overwhelmed him. She whispered a message into his ear, "I think that we have lots of sexual chemistry."

Itachi was sure that nothing short of a shocked, blank look registered on his face but it must have been comedic because Hisaki was prompted into another burst of giggles that progressed to laughter and died into a silent shaking of her shoulders. Though he was embarrassed, Itachi felt a bit happy too.

When they reached the memorial stone, their hands parted and Hisaki worked to lay down her flowers and light her incense. The warmth of her hand, now absent from him, made his hand feel strangely cold and empty. As a reflexive action, his fingers curled his hand into a fist and he watched Hisaki go about lighting the incense.

The smoke from the incense rose in fragile wisps, twisting and turning before getting whisked away in the breeze.

After she lit the incense, Hisaki stood up and walked back to stand beside Itachi. Though they stood nearly shoulder to shoulder, their hands didn't touch. The next hour or so was spent in silence, each lost in their respective thoughts. Restlessness captured him once again and Itachi felt the urge to move. He shifted his weight, shuffled his feet, and ran a hand through his hair. Her words echoed in his head, _sexual chemistry_. And for the first time in eighteen years, he wondered what sex felt like.

"Itachi," said Hisaki so softly she could have been whispering. He snapped out of his thoughts and willed himself not to blush again for fear it would betray his thoughts. She wouldn't have noticed even if he did, because she didn't look at him. "You're fidgeting," she pointed out.

"Sorry," he said, not even realizing that she'd noticed.

Hands touched his clenched fist. Both her hands had enclosed around his fist, her fingers met his and slowly but surely, she unfurled his fist. He watched her fingers move with a detached fascination. She smoothed his hand out and then held his hand in both of hers. He didn't know what she meant by it, so he stood for a moment, waiting for her to make another move. It seemed that Hisaki was at a loss for what to do next, so she stood there, holding his hand.

It was the appearance of Sasuke that ended their idleness. He had appeared by way of the training ground, having obviously gotten bored of doing whatever it was he had done after Itachi left. It was by chance that he spotted Itachi standing with Hisaki at the memorial stone. Neither was sure what he made of them, but Sasuke made no move to let them know either. Instead, he sauntered up to the two older kids, took each's hand in one of his and led them back to the village, declaring that he was hungry.

* * *

His hand was much smaller than hers; his entire hand could nearly fit on just her palm. His grip was a strong one. His strides drove him forward. He walked like he had somewhere to be. He was confident and sure of himself...unlike Itachi. She nearly giggled at the contrast between the two brothers.

Itachi, who was so skilled and so capable and so formidable, held her by the barest contact of their skin. He waited for her to act and bore silent witness to her antics. Sasuke on the other hand, was no less defenceless than she was. He was six, and he led her by her hand and didn't even turn around to see how she'd reacted to this. Perhaps he was shy, and trying to hide his flushing cheeks from her view. Perhaps he was starting to conjure embarrassment in his own impulsive actions and was now too self-conscious to face her.

"Sasuke, where are we going?" asked his brother. The tone in which he asked it was so soft and patient, so full of love and tolerance that Hisaki had to fight her urge to smile once again. Itachi was so quiet, so shy, and so tense and in his own way, innocent as well, and he still managed to play the role of an ideal older brother for Sasuke.

It had been hard to put Itachi from her mind since their previous meeting. Later, she found out that Itachi was rather well-known in their village. Every person she met had something good to say about him. She'd always known he was pretty brilliant, she just never knew how brilliant he really was. And then she couldn't help admiring him every time she noticed him in passing, not because of what he'd done, but because he seemed to be a genuinely good person.

"Home," said Sasuke resolutely. "We're going home, because I like home-cooked meals best. Haha-ue and chichi-ue are attending a meeting tonight so haha-ue said aniki would make dinner." After the long winded explanation, silence fell. During that silence, Itachi exchanged a glance with Hisaki and both were wondering the same thing.

"Are you inviting Hisaki-san for dinner too then?" asked Itachi in mild contemplation.

"Aniki, you looked like you were _never_ going to leave that place if your _girlfriend_ didn't come too," said Sasuke with exasperation. "So I'm taking her home!" Sasuke declared. "Where you can stare at her while you make me dinner… as long as you don't overcook the rice."

"She's not my girlfriend," said Itachi at the same moment Hisaki said, "He's not my boyfriend." They both blushed after speaking in unison and sneaking a furtive glance which the other caught because they both looked at the same time. Sasuke rolled his eyes at the two big kids and noted how weird big kids could be. He hoped out loud that he would never be like his older brother in this strange aspect. An awkward silence fell.

"If you're not aniki's girlfriend," said Sasuke once they'd reached the gates of the Uchiha complex. "Then you're not invited to dinner anymore."

"Sasuke, that's rude," said Itachi sternly. Sasuke bowed his head in regret of his words. Itachi turned to Hisaki, "You're welcome to come over for dinner, if you'd like."

Hisaki laughed at Sasuke's words, the boy, even when rude, was so irresistibly adorable. He was like Naruto, brash in words and actions, but lovable none the less. "Not tonight," she told Itachi, not because she didn't want to go, but because she didn't want him to invite her only on account of making up for Sasuke's lack of inhibition. "Thanks for the invitation, but maybe another time. Anyways, it was nice to have your company this afternoon."

"Yes, it was," agreed Itachi quickly.

"So I'll see you around?" asked Hisaki, smiling at him. Itachi nodded and they parted ways. As they walked in opposite directions, Hisaki heard Sasuke remark; "She was just scared to taste your cooking, and she's right to be. Can we go out to eat?" Laughing, Hisaki returned home.

* * *

"To be honest, I was hoping you would make such a huge show of your horrible cooking skills that your girlfriend would step in and end up making me dinner," confessed Sasuke sadly as he walked home with his hand in Itachi's. "She looks like the kind of girl who's good at cooking… no offense, Aniki."

"She's not my girlfriend," said Itachi again. "If you wanted Hisaki-san to cook you dinner, why did you retract your dinner invitation?"

"I didn't think she's _really_ not your girlfriend, Aniki," said Sasuke. He looked at his brother thoughtfully but remained silent. Itachi watched his younger brother ponder in silence. Itachi wondered what had led to Sasuke believing Hisaki was her girlfriend. Though Sasuke held his hand now, the sensation for her hands still lingered and he wondered if she was angry that Sasuke had been so tactless and so rude. She_ had_ refused his dinner invitation after all.

Maybe she was distancing herself because she didn't want to be mistaken for his girlfriend. He didn't blame her. Being involved with him generally came with many implications the least of which was his occupation. Being a ninja meant you were more prone to death and lasting injury than most people, of course, Itachi had already beaten the odds at four years old.

"Sasuke, let's go out to eat," said Itachi, who decided he was really in no mood to cook, or consume his cooking, and felt it rather cruel to force Sasuke into it. Sasuke cheered to the empty street as he promptly turned around to lead the way to his favourite restaurant.

* * *

Sasuke is a little bit of a plotter this chapter, but logic would have it that he must have picked _some_ skills of coercion form his brother. I like the younger Sasuke. He seems like he could have grown up to be really, really good.


	7. Adversarial

I'm still alive!  
To those who may have worried (I'm just flattering myself here), you need not do so. I swear, I know what's going to happen in this story and how it's going to end. It's just that I've been super busy with school and such that I can't guarantee frequent updates. None the less, _thank you so much_ for following this story and thank you for your reviews. I hope you enjoy this story as much as I do.

As always, thank you for choosing to read this.

* * *

**Adversarial.**

Despite all the contradicting testimonies against this, the fact was that Itachi was a crier. Though it may seem that he wasn't the type of guy to just let the tears shed, he was. People generally saw him as the kind of person who generally didn't show much emotion, and granted he didn't exactly sob while he shed tears, but the fact still remained that the stoic eighteen year old did in fact have feelings and he did cry.

Crying was an activity he found very therapeutic, especially when violence was not an applicable source of emotional outlet. And thus, like a poor, sad, sad, little man, whenever Itachi felt sufficiently stressed, distressed, upset, or emotional, he sat in his room alone and cried. Two nights after his last meeting with Hisaki, this was exactly what he did.

* * *

Sometimes, good people are put into situations where they must carry out bad deeds. Such was especially the case when one took up the occupation of shinobi, in which situations were constantly changing and sometimes, the bad deeds became inevitable. The year he met Hisaki was also the same year that the first mission casualty fell by his hand.

On Wednesday, the day after Sasuke had accused Hisaki of being his girlfriend, Itachi was sent on an important mission. It was more or less an espionage mission, seek out a group of outlaws who were threatening the safety of Konoha and its surrounding villages, find out what they were planning to do, and stop them, if need be. The mission was simple enough, one that only really required the services of one shinobi, but as with general protocol, shinobi worked in teams of three. So he, along with two other both newly promoted jounins embarked on their mission.

Itachi had never previously worked with these two ninjas, but because of his young age (Itachi was younger than both of them), he was not shown the sort of respect that a squad leader would regularly have. Itachi didn't mind this in the slightest, for it had never mattered to him what other people thought. The complication came when (perhaps tired and fed up of a weekend of intelligence work) one of his team members had downright refused to follow his orders.

The group of outlaws were strengthening in numbers and there was ambition of an invasion of Konoha and usurping the Hokage's power. Had it gone Itachi's way, he would have returned to the village, informed the Hokage and before the weekend, the group of thugs would have been apprehended. Perhaps overconfident because of his recent promotion, one of Itachi's squad members, a man by the name of Niwashima Hiroto was insistent that the right decision was to personally teach the group a lesson. He might have overlooked the fact that they were outnumbered at least ten to one, and despite Itachi's squad likely being more skilled than any of the street thugs, it would not be efficient or productive.

Yet despite Itachi's constant warnings, before they could return to Konoha, the idiot of a man had snuck off; trying to take the group of bandits off guard and Itachi had to go take back his man. Hiroto was injured and losing the fight when Itachi and their third man arrived. Of course, the group was no match for the combined efforts of three Konoha jounins and Itachi's sharingan, even if one was injured. In less than an hour, most of the thugs were incapacitated, some had fled, but some gave chase as Itachi and his team were returning to the village. There was a pursuit, and they couldn't move nearly as fast while supporting an injured man. One of the pursuers was faster than anyone on Itachi's squad could have predicted and in an effort to hinder the man, Itachi threw a kunai at him.

He had been aiming to hinder or disable. Generally, Itachi's aim was excellent, regardless of the size or movement of the target and he could throw his weapon with such speed that by the time a target could react, the weapon would have already hit. This man however, was a very talented ninja himself and saw it coming just at the nick of time, which would be his downfall. He moved to dodge and instead of hitting his shoulder as it would have, the kunai scraped past his neck, severing his cartoid artery.

The man shouted in surprise and pain. Looking back, Itachi saw what seemed to be a sea of red. Blood spurted out from his neck, splattering everything that was within a close enough vicinity. It came out in sync to the pumping of the man's heart. There was nothing that anyone could do. He gasped and gurgled and in less than a minute, he fell thirty feet from the tree top, dying if not already dead. Itachi and his team were gone before he hit the ground.

His uninjured teammate sighed with a breath of relief and grinned nervously at Itachi. "Good one," he said. "I thought we were never going to lose him."

Hiroto had gone unconscious and Itachi didn't reply so the entire journey was silent but for Itachi's thoughts screaming panic at him. For the first time ever, a man had died by his hand. Perhaps he was not an innocent man, but a man none the less. In the time it took for Itachi to blink, he had gone from being a public servant, a peacekeeper, to being a killer. He had taken a life, and the only reaction anyone else had was to tell him it had been a good one. The world did not make sense.

By the time he'd reported the details of the mission to the Hokage and returned home, it was very late into the night. Both the Sandaime and his own father had commended him for his noble and hard work on the mission, telling him all the things they thought he'd wanted to hear. All the while, it seemed as if death had become an acceptable norm to everyone around him.

That night, he didn't sleep. Alone in his bedroom, Itachi stayed up the whole night and shed silent tears, part in sadness and guilt and frustration and part for fear that the old nightmares would come to haunt him.

* * *

_The very last time he saw his brother, saw anyone for that matter, he cried. Maybe it was because his body was so sick and so tired of life, of fighting to live and living to fight... or maybe it was because he had no more tears to shed. That time, the last time he saw Sasuke, the last time that he saw, he had cried blood.

* * *

_

"Good morning," Hisaki Uchiha greeted him the next morning with a sweet smile when they met each other. This time, it was inside the Uchiha complex. They were bound to have come across each other there eventually. Because he was so tired, he hardly recognized her. Everything he saw was no more than a focused blur.

"Morning," said Itachi, who was _so_ tired, yet too afraid of old horrors etched into his mindset to have gotten any sleep. On top of being tired, he was also feeling impatient and very grumpy that morning. It was the equivalent of having gotten up on the wrong side of the bed, only he'd never actually gone to bed.

He had done a lot of thinking, and he decided that he was very angry. He was angry at himself, first and foremost, for having done the horrible deed. He was also angry at his idiotic teammate, for having been so stupid and reckless in the first place. He was also substantially annoyed at the Hokage and at his own parents, for not understanding his dilemma. After that, he felt rather betrayed because it occurred to him that they (all being accomplished ninja) must have taken lives during their careers too.

"You look like you're dead," Hisaki quipped rather cheerfully. She had only just gotten back from taking Naruto back to the Hokage and the little man always put her in a good mood.

Perhaps 'dead' was the trigger word, but the moment she said it, Itachi felt his annoyance rising once again. Now he was angry at her too. He found it hard to believe that even _she_, the girl who cried at a memorial stone every other Tuesday, could use such a subject so flippantly. She must have recognized that what she said had upset him, because she stopped smiling too.

"Wow, sorry," said Hisaki, looking almost mockingly concerned. "I wasn't aware that you were so opposed to being teased."

Itachi scowled. What did she know? She was just a stupid insensitive girl who'd probably never had an ounce of pressure from anyone to do anything. As soon as the malicious thought came, Itachi felt bad for even thinking it. It wasn't her fault he was a ninja, or that she didn't know what was upsetting him or that every day of his life he had to carry out tasks that opposed his personal ethics.

"Why are you so quiet today?" she asked him. This was a strange question because as far as Itachi was aware, he had never been verbose around her to begin with.

"I am I any different than I was before?" he asked.

"Yes," she said dryly. "Usually you're an impartial, apathetic silent. Today, your silence is angry...and brooding, and _sulky_." When he didn't reply to this with more than a scowl and narrowing of his eyes, she continued. "Anyways, it's none of my business what's on your mind. You don't have to tell me if you're not inclined to do so."

"Alright, I'm _not_ inclined to do so," said Itachi firmly.

"_Fine_ then," said Hisaki, sounding like an affronted child.

"Fine," said Itachi too.

They stood there, glaring each other down in a way more befitting of two eight year olds than eighteen year olds.

"Where are you going?" she asked him finally.

"That's hardly your business either," Itachi pointed out irritably. When he first saw her that morning, Itachi had no intentions of acting this way but the more she deflected his anger, the more irritated he got and the more he wanted her to share in his frustrations. Truthfully, he had been heading home for breakfast after his morning training, which was never a big deal or much of a secret.

"Itachi," she said, looking him right in the eyes. Itachi almost averted her eyes but when she caught his gaze, she held it. He realized in a short moment that Hisaki was a very pretty girl. She was beautiful in a very typically Uchiha way, like his own mother, or more like Junri, whose appearance Itachi only vaguely remembered. She had very kind eyes, and a lot of love.

* * *

There was a time when no one in the village looked twice at Itachi. There was a time when he was recognized as no more than the son of Fugaku and Mikoto, an Uchiha. There was a time when words like 'genius' or 'prodigy' were not associated with his name. During that time, Junri Uchiha, who was a good friend of Itachi's mother, would often visit. Itachi, who was so young, was not so aware of who she was, or what position she held in the clan, but he liked her.

Junri was very kind to him. She laughed very easily, and she never treated him like he was baby. Even at a young age, Itachi did not enjoy being patronized by adults who believed they could see through his every intention and correct his behaviour because they were older and wiser. Junri used to sit with Itachi at the kitchen table and have conversations with him.

When he was four, Junri and her husband died on a mission.

* * *

"What?" Itachi replied, suddenly feeling very tired and very worn out. He wanted nothing more than to be alone and to be able to sleep in peace. He sighed. Warm hands met his cheeks and right before Hisaki pointed it out, he realized it for himself. The tears had blurred his vision minutes before and drop by drop, they rolled down his cheeks, burning his skin along the way.

"You're crying."


	8. Fear

First of all, _sorry_. I'm very sorry for the extremely long periods between updates and I'm sorry the chapters aren't longer. I'll try my best to update more frequently, but this story is my baby and I don't want to mess it up. Second of all, _thank you_. Thank you very much for reading and (eight chapters in) continuing to follow and thank you very much for the kind words you leave me in your reviews.

* * *

**Fear.**

Her hands were as soft as he might have imagined; her touch, nicer than he ever dared to expect. All she did was wipe away his tears with her thumbs but there was something intimate about the moment. She was looking straight at him with her earnest dark eyes and before he could help himself more tears fell and soon he was all but sobbing into her shoulder. She let him cry. She didn't even question the reason or meaning behind his sudden burst of emotion. She didn't look at him any different and it was in that moment that Itachi realized that for the first time he could remember there was a person who saw him as just another person and not a concept or an ideal. She had no expectations for him, if she did, she kept them to herself which Itachi was immensely grateful for.

Again she held his hand and led him back out of the complex, not even asking whether or not he wanted to go somewhere with her. Itachi didn't even refuse her silent offer, feeling that if in that moment, he had to be with another person, Hisaki would be the only one he would accept. So he followed her. Walking down the streets, they were just a normal boy and a normal girl, spending time together. Itachi kept his head down and no one looked twice. They walked and walked, holding hands, until his tears subsided and his vision became clear again. When they finally stopped at their destination, Itachi found himself a the forest clearing near the river where people sometimes went to swim or bathe.

He didn't know what they were doing there, so he followed her lead and sat down on the still dewy grass and watched as she lay down beside him, closing her eyes and steadying her breathing. He could have left; he was sure that Hisaki would have done nothing to stop him. Honestly, he didn't really have a reason to stay. His mother and father and Sasuke were probably expecting him. He wasn't even sure that he liked being in her company; every time Itachi was with her, it was a new and generally unsettling experience and frustration of that was that they never did _anything_ out of the ordinary.

He could have got up and returned home to his awaiting family, returning to his life as Itachi Uchiha, who bore all the hopes and dreams and ambitions of the Uchiha clan. However, for just a little while, even if it was only for five minutes, he wanted to be able to be someone who could live without constant worry of the consequences of his actions. He was quickly beginning to realize that regardless of what he did, how well he performed; there would be consequences for _someone_. Even the thought briefly crossing his mind made him want to throw in the towel, run away and give up but there were consequences for _that_ too.

So he laid down on the grass beside her, feeling the coolness of the ground through his clothes. He put his hand on top of hers –she didn't draw it away- and closed his eyes too. When he did so, his surroundings overwhelmed his other senses. He could hear the rustling of blades of grass and leaves in the soft breeze, the water streaming along, birds chirping, the sound of Hisaki's light breathing beside him. He could smell the grass, fresh and dewy, and the cleanliness of the air and water where they were. He could feel the coolness of the ground, the caress of the breath and the feeling of her hand –significantly softer and smaller- in his.

* * *

_Konan was melancholy, quiet and deadly thus naturally, of all the Akatsuki members, she was the whose company Itachi most 'enjoyed' for lack of a better term. She wasn't constantly demanding company, threatening retribution, or being needlessly macabre or violent like too many a member in their strange organization. If he had met her outside of Akatsuki, he might have thought that she was normal._

_They were sitting together on one of the Shinto shrine in Amegakure, keeping a lookout because they were being tracked by some misinformed rival mercenary group foolish enough to believe that they could take down the Akatsuki to eliminate competition. Really, only one member was needed for the job; one Akatsuki member could have wiped out their entire organization, but the rule was that they always travelled in pairs. So the silent duo stayed atop the Shinto and for the first time since they'd met, Konan spoke to him._

"_What was the worst thing you've ever done?"_

_It was the question that struck him, because he was pulled back to a conversation not awfully long ago that began with that very question. They didn't look at each other, and Itachi wondered why she would ask when she (along with every other person, everywhere) already knew the answer to that question...rather they thought they did._

"_You first," he said, polite as a gentleman to a beautiful lady._

"_My ineptitude led to the death of the one person that I loved, at the hand of our best friend..."_

"_Do you ever wish you could go back to the times before that happened?"_

"_No," she replied firmly. "Before that time, I was stupidly naive of the cruelties of the world."_

"_And now...?"_

"_Now I'm fighting to change that."_

"_Even before the worst thing I've done, I killed a man without thinking. And at that time, I didn't know if there was anything worse than that. Now I realize that worse than that is what I do now; killing even after think about it."_

"_And what was it...that thing that you did?"_

_They looked at each other for the first time that day. In one glance, Itachi knew that she had realized his story was more than killing his clan for the sake of testing his abilities. They looked away again, straight out into the distance where a group of men were running through the forest._

"_Before that time, there was a girl that I loved, who reciprocated..."_

"_...Where is she now?"_

_Itachi never replied to her question, but Konan was smart and he knew she'd understood his silence._

* * *

"What's the worst thing you've ever done?"

The question came, not from the general conversation starter of the two, but from Itachi, who didn't open his eyes to met hers but kept them closed not wanting to see her expression now, nor later. She opened the eye closest to him, looking over with it to see him lying serenely on the grass. She looked back, opening her other eye too and staring up at that soft blue skies and the wisps of clouds that took their time floating by.

All he wanted out of the question was to know that Hisaki wasn't perfect or completely good; that even a girl like her could have made a mistake or done something wrong.

"When I was twelve, my grandmother was so constantly bitter about everything. Every day and night she would complain about everything, snapping at the littlest things and she always went on about how I was a disgrace to the family and the clan for choosing not to become a ninja, saying that I was the reason everyone looked down at her. I got so tired and angry of it that one day, I yelled back, and I told her that if she had nothing left her to live for, then she should just die... and it was like I cursed her. Soon after, she fell ill, and never got better."

Itachi looked over at her, opening his eyes and losing his vision for a brief moment to the brightness of the day. Hisaki was lying beside him, looking up at the sky and her eyes were brimming with tears.

"On Wednesday, I killed a man without thinking twice."

A tear slid down her cheek and when their eyes met, he could see that she understood that to be the source of his strange behaviour. There had been a reason he didn't want to see her reaction and it was his worst anticipation made true when he saw the terrified, appalled expression she wore.

Her silence told him she didn't know what to say to that.

"...Are you afraid of me?"

"What do I have to fear?"

"A person who had killed changes... there will be a time, when another situation arises. He'll think to himself: I've done this once, I can do it again, and he will. Then he'll do it again and again, and then slowly the guilt will start to fade and soon he'll find that without it, he's nothing and he'll begin to relish it and _want_ to do it."

"So I guess the answer to your question is no. I am not afraid of you; _you_ are the one that's afraid of yourself."

When she said the words out loud, Itachi realized how true she was. Ever since he was a child, he had been so extremely aware of exactly what he fears and all the time he'd held it so close to his heart and so clearly in his mind that this new strange fear was foreign to him. _This_ fear was like having all the things that had made him lose sleep wrapped up into one package that he could never escape from. It was reminiscent of being deathly afraid of a psychotic murderer only to eventually realize that _you_ are that murderer. A chill ran through his spine.

Hisaki sat up, leaning on her arm for support. Her long black hair fell over her shoulders and nearly skimmed the ground. It shone in the sun, looking so smooth and silky. The urge to touch it, run his fingers through it to confirm for himself play a momentary distraction for Itachi. She reached towards him with her free hand and swept his own growing locks of long hair away from his face and neck.

"If you are afraid of what you'll become, then don't become it."

* * *

_Six men lay dead on the ground at his feet, another six littered around the nearby vicinity of the forest. Konan gave him a nod which told him that the job was done and he followed in her stride back to the village. As he went, the remnants of both conversations crossed his mind and he realized how extremely ironic it was..._

_As hard as he'd fought, as different as he'd tried to be and regardless of his personal motivations, he'd doubtless become exactly the kind of person that his four year old self had feared most._


End file.
